


We to You

by dracoqueen22



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Campaign 2 (Critical Role), F/M, Pining, Possibly Unrequited Love, Pre-Relationship, Set During the Xhorhas Arc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-09
Updated: 2019-09-09
Packaged: 2020-10-12 21:56:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20571548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dracoqueen22/pseuds/dracoqueen22
Summary: ‘We’ was safer. ‘We’ made it a gift from Caleb and Nott, and implied nothing more than friendship no matter what else lay in Caleb’s heart.





	We to You

He saw it in the window as they passed, and though his funds were already marked for more paper and ink, important items to help him reach his goals, Caleb hesitated. He lingered, indecisive, fingering his coin pouch as he deliberated.   
  
It was lovely, and it was perfect, and it must have been fate, for such a thing to be here, and to catch his eye.   
  
"What is it?" Nott asked, and Caleb's heart pounded too loud in his ears for him to come up with an adequate lie.   
  
"Jester would like that," Caleb said.   
  
Nott followed his gaze, stared hard into the window. "Yeah. She would. You think we should get it for her?"  
  
_I want to get it for her. _  
  
We, however, was safe. We made it a gift from Caleb and Nott. We implied nothing but friends thinking kindly about other friends.   
  
"She misses her mother," Caleb murmured. "It might make her feel better."   
  
"It's pretty expensive," Nott said, and her ears twitched, her voice filled with mischief. "I'll bet I could steal it. We could try one of our schemes. Or I could just buy it that way you can save your coin."   
  
Caleb's thumb passed over his coin purse again, knowing down to the last copper how much he carried. Nott could afford it. He could not.   
  
'We' could make it a gift. Caleb couldn't.   
  
He looked down at himself. Still shabby. Still a little unkempt. Tidier with his new, more Xhorhasian clothing and shaved also. But a human. They might not be willing to negotiate with a human, no matter the badge he carried.   
  
Caleb knew better than to spend coin on frivolities. But he thought of Jester's smile, the delight in her eyes, and his belly twisted into knots.   
  
_What are you even thinking, Widogast? That smile is not for you._   
  
"Caleb?"   
  
"Let's get it for her," Caleb said, in defiance of that quiet voice inside of him. He was a garbage person, and perhaps brightening Jester's day did very little to change that, but he'd rather see her smile than not.   
  
He would give anything to keep her smiling.   
  
Caleb thought of Essek as a template and invoked a disguise over himself. Surely someone from Den Thelyss would be well-received in a place like this.   
  
Nott grinned up at him with eyes that were all too knowing. "That's a good look."   
  
Caleb turned hot behind the disguise. "Let's go," he said, and pulled poise, elegance, and wealth over him like a mantle.   
  
Nott snorted a laugh.   
  


~

  
  
They split the cost, which made it easier for the present to become a gift from 'we' as opposed to a gift from Caleb. He had enough left for paper and ink and incense, but his pockets were much lightened of coin by the time he and Nott returned to the Xhorhouse, laden with packages, including something Nott had found for Yeza.   
  
"Here," Caleb said, as they heard Jester's laugh coming from the kitchen. From the sound of it, Beau was in there as well, and Caleb had no defenses against her insight. He was not ready for a conversation of that magnitude.   
  
Caleb's courage failed him, and he tumbled the elegantly wrapped box into Nott's hands. "You should give this to her."   
  
"It was your idea," Nott spluttered as she juggled her own package so she didn't drop either.   
  
"Yes, but it was your coin.” Caleb backed away before Nott could push it back on him. He wasn't fleeing, he was making a strategic retreat. "And I have work to do. Upstairs. Goodbye."   
  
She called after him; he ignored her.   
  
He went to his study, closed the door behind him, and dropped into the comfortable chair he'd bought. It was one of the few luxury items he'd allowed himself. He set his purchases on the table with a loud thunk, staring at the pile of paper and ink and incense, all he'd need to continue trying to change his world.   
  
He snapped his fingers, and Frumpkin appeared, giving him a narrow-eyed look that matched Nott's, judgment for judgment.   
  
"What?" Caleb asked.   
  
Frumpkin offered a slow blink.   
  
"Yes, I am a coward." Caleb rose and started to organize his supplies, the sort of random reshuffling which accomplished little, but occupied his hands. "I have never denied that. It is for the best, you know."   
  
Frumpkin flicked his tail and walked across the table, purposefully treading on Caleb's carefully stacked papers, wrinkling them.   
  
"Easy for you to say," Caleb said. "You are a cat. You don't have such troubles."  
  
Frumpkin paused and stretched, arching his back and extending his claws, nearly knocking over the bottle of ink, though it was still capped and therefore, out of danger.   
  
Caleb sighed and sank down in his chair. "I am not worthy," he murmured. "She deserves better. They deserve better, but they are stuck with me for now, so I must do my best to make it worthwhile."   
  
Frumpkin sneezed and planted his butt on Caleb's box of incense, tail curling around his four feet, head tilted imperiously.   
  
"I stayed, didn't I?" Caleb said, ever so quietly, so only Frumpkin would hear. "Maybe I should not have."   
  
_Thump-thump-thump-thud!_  
  
"Cayyyylllllleb!"   
  
Caleb's eyes widened. He had all of a moment to react before a loud bang knocked against his door, the knob rattling noisily.   
  
"Caleb, why did you lock us out! Let me in!" Jester's voice came muffled through the thick wood, though the sound of her fist impacting it was much louder. The hinges shook.   
  
Us?  
  
_Bang, bang, bang!_  
  
"Yeah, Caleb," Beau said, and by the gods, she was smirking. Caleb couldn't see her, but her tone said it all. "Why won't you let us in? Whatcha doin' in there, huh?"   
  
Frumpkin gave him a look.   
  
Caleb sighed. He stood to unlock the door before they broke it in an attempt to get in. Or worse, resorted to magic. He wouldn't put it past Jester to use Dimension Door if she thought someone was having fun without her.   
  
He reached for the lock just as Beau started to knock again -- because it had to be Beau with that rapid-fire rapping of knuckles.   
  
"I was concentrating," Caleb said as he swung open the door.   
  
Jester grinned up at him, Beau leaning against the wall near the door, smirking indeed, and looking quite smug if Caleb had to guess.   
  
"You need the door shut to concentrate?" Beau asked, giving her fingers a wriggle.   
  
"You are impossible," Caleb told her, but suddenly, he had an armful of tiefling, smelling of sweetness and kindness and light. "Ah, Jester, I--"   
  
"Thank you, Caleb!" Jester's hug better qualified as an attack, given her strength, but Caleb bore it with dignity. Along with the smacking kiss to his cheek. "It's beautiful. I love it."   
  
"You're welcome," Caleb said, awkwardly patting her back until she bounced out of the embrace. "Nott bought it so..."   
  
"She said it was your idea so I'm thanking you, too," Jester said, poking him in the chest, right atop his pounding heart.   
  
Caleb swallowed over the lump in his throat. "I'm glad you like it."   
  
"I love it," Jester corrected, and he was right. Her smile was bright enough to cut through the clouds hanging over Xhorhas, and her eyes sparkled like sapphires. "I'm going to listen to it every night."   
  
Frumpkin meowed and twisted around Caleb's feet.   
  
"Okay, Jess. You told him thanks. Now let him get back to his very important concentration, yeah?" Beau said, still with that look, the knowing one Caleb had learned to fear so much.   
  
Jester laughed. "I guess." Some of her enthusiasm deflated, but it quickly revived when she remembered, "Oh. I need to help Caduceus finish those lanterns anyway. I promised I'd be back after a snack and that was an hour ago."   
  
“Mr. Clay barely notices the passing of time. I’m sure he’s forgotten already,” Caleb said.   
  
Jester giggled, and it had no right to be so charming. “You’re probably right.” She leaned in and planted a kiss on Caleb’s cheek before he could back away. “Thanks again, Caleb. You’re the best.”   
  
“You’re welcome,” Caleb said.   
  
Jester skipped away, skirts flaring around her, and Caleb didn’t moon after her like a teenager. He was too old and weary for such a thing.   
  
“Smooth move, Widogast,” Beau said, and Caleb startled, because he’d forgotten she was there.   
  
Beau’s grin was shark-like and full of teeth. She socked him on the arm. Gently, he supposed, for Beauregard. “Keep it up.”   
  
“I don’t know what you mean,” Caleb said.   
  
“Sure you don’t.”   
  
Beauregard pushed off the doorway and sauntered after Jester, hands in her pockets, whistling a nonsense tune. She offered no explanation for her words, but Caleb was certain she’d hold on to her mysteries until they’d be most effective.   
  
He touched his cheek where the warmth of Jester’s kiss lingered.   
  
Ach. This was not a thing for him. But if it was…   
  
If it was, he’d be a very happy man right now.   
  
Caleb hummed and returned to his desk, Frumpkin winding around his feet, attempting to trip him, as cats were wont to do. He’d taken Caleb’s suggestions to study cat behavior seriously. Perhaps too seriously.   
  
“Yes, I know you were right,” Caleb said as he plopped back down into his chair, trying to ignore the little bubble of warm happiness in the center of his chest. “You don’t have to keep saying it.”   
  
Frumpkin twitched his tail. Smugly, in Caleb’s point of view.   
  
Caleb fought off a grin. He picked up his quill and the pot of magical ink and the nice, expensive paper, the stack a little smaller than it should have been, but well.   
  
It was worth it to see Jester smile.   
  


***

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback is absolutely welcome and appreciated. :)


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